A Rant.

Yes,yes I am CA student. A new transformation has possessed me. Nerds watch out, I have decided to take this up. Oh! wait I have not. Go on, go on. You know I won’t get anywhere close to you. Simple because, I have a brain, which has drunk philosophy and embraced the Utopian dreams.

See that is how you can suck away the optimism. Now I am scrutinizing my English as I write, so do spare me, for a lack of zest. I haven’t been reading or listening to good English, thanks to the my exam preparations. I must admit though, that reading all that makes me feel wiser.

Actually I am really really wise. But no one is going to give a damn about wisdom. If you have wisdom, go and give advise to young things, they need to sleep. See what can you do then? When kings don’t listen to prophets and philosophers, empires shall be doomed from the North. If you do listen, you will find a beautiful maiden from the East.

But be warned, since ye doth not hears the saws of the wise one, doom awaits you. My head is not working properly. I lack the veer and swerve to write anything. I seem to be short of words. If not for Bones(ya the T.V. show) I might be a scarecrow by now.

I seem to appreciate humour which I usually never liked. The “peter” has turned into Jack, but there are no sparrows, only crows. Truthfully, I don’t really like all these laws and stuff. Yet.

No, I don’t mean I am going to start loving the subjects from tomorrow. I want to be a writer. But all that is happening is that whatever little the Muses gave me,  seem to be  getting screwed by legal requirements, taxes and laws. And the only bird I have seen for a while is Twitter.

So I think, I want to become an actor now. Come on I can act, alright! But ya ya, life is a disappointment in so many ways. Oh! the throes and tribulations! What does time decree anyway?

I am being too frank, maybe? I do wish, I can do something more. I feel stuck. I am not the sort of fellow, who is used to studying. Expectations, but they do exist. I wish, I existed a century or so before. I could have written words which would have stirred revolutions and stuff. Cool, I mean, kids would be reading about me and memorizing my poems and cursing me.

Or I might have been a saint or something. Wisdom and Bhakti sallying on command. The Gods’ dances and confusion would have been interpreted properly and maybe, I would have stopped Communalism and the other dirty works by putting some sense into few certain heads.

See I think too much. Maybe it is my imagination that spoils things for me. Maybe, I should be a narrow-minded ass. But, my education consisted of reading books, blogs and learning to see the world, think and appreciate stuff. Too much, I guess, for petty reality.

Or I should try becoming a rowdy. No need to worry about the law, about money etc etc. Waaaaat Machi? No, that sound like me. What can I do anyway? I am walking on a knife edge, or so it seems. I feel out of place. See I have grown a lot in the last year or so. Specially with respect to moving with people and all.

I have accepted that I am either going to be loved or hated and some how everyone notices me, where I go. Then I meet a few people and again I start hoping, but maybe I should wear broken glasses and see the vilified nature of men. But I am an idiot, I can’t. Can someone teach me?

I should stop now, or my emotions will take over. This blog, after all is open to everyone. See when you hide something, everyone wants to know. Have no secrets and no one will look, just let everyone know everything and they will be confused as to what you are anyway. They don’t get it that you are you.

See it is better to talk about abstracts glossed in metaphors. No one understands all that. It becomes like a code, which very few understand. I think, I will stop here. Thank you for reading. Pour some wisdom into me, but none which preaches common sense 😛

My little sister’s project on Mughals :)

Yup thats my sister and her friends 😛 They did this for a computer science project 🙂 (after making me download a software called Photostory { ya microsoft does have a few free software!} ) .

” Laziness is the mother of invention” , so mom feels because :-

Got them to speak through the speaker mode on the phone from their houses.

Click here to read her entry and comment on it 🙂

HA if only I was that innovative 😛 The maximum I have done till date is to assemble a project in under 15 mins( took print outs of the material and pics , told people to bring charts , sketches etc and assembled in school 😛 – I do miss those things 😦 )

And ya do comment on her blog ( ya ya she finally has decided it is high time she starts writing over there diligently 🙂 )

P.S:-Krithu I know you don’t like me to call you little , but come on kiddo , you are only in seventh!!

THE GLASS PALACE BY AMITAV GHOSH(book review)

Image from here.

The book takes us into the lives of three generations. The central character being Rajkumar . The book starts with the erstwhile Burmese empire being annexed into British India , where , as the rulers are on their way into exile Rajkumar (then about 11) falls in love with Dolly(about 10) one of their servants. Many years later , he goes to Ratnagiri(where the former ruler of Burma lives in exile) , finds Dolly and marries her. The story then evolves as it follows their children and then their grandchild.

THIS BOG HAS BEEN MOVED,TO READ THE FULL REVIEW, CLICK HERE.

I live on forever.

Note:-The first stanza is inspired by the poem “the brook“.

And people may come 
and people may go,
but in my eyes,
i live on forever.

For the world is nothing
but what i perceive
and a coloured chart
which has my blood
and my thoughts
as the hues which
lend it,its meaning.
Nothing is bigger than what i see
and nothing is smaller than what i see,
all are as free as i see them free.
Everything to me revolves around me
and imagination is a world where in
everything has its own capable need.
from nowhere descends thoughts,
except by instinct
and in it i will dwell till i go extinct.
Words are mere forms of expression
thinking the base to factual actualization.
Yet behind art lives a thought
which captivates and helps cultivate
a sense of belonging to fulfill
the aesthetic longing.
In a world of azure skies
and pretty ornaments
who skid along the vast screen-
as if my thoughts from somewhere
wanted to know the way to heaven’s street,
walk across me-the belief that though
tangential might be the senses hold,
it is what helps us tell and be told.
At that point we see and try to be
and belong to this nether land
under the sky which holds the universe
and so the horizon dream.

History in yards and yards of cloth
and palm and paper and what not,
yet nothing can be learned
unless within them they have a yearn.
Tomorrow’s life is today’s dream
and yet today we see ourselves
the harbinger of our doom tomorrow.
Every step we take
and every action we commit and help make,
we induce and refuse the forces
within which act as the futures prefaces.
In grandeur and beauty we might fall,
yet their magic lasts as long as we a part.
And when the haze disperses,
we find in our mind’s purses
that we have been spell bound
by something that was built with a pound
of flesh and ounce of blood
and beyond that the thoughts on which
the lusty past fed.
Yet in pitiable reverence we seek to praise
those who moved the stones
and covered a scar with a tattoo
instead of the thinker who
decided that it shall be made beautiful.

Want is creed essential
as belonging is vesper real.
for if not a faith be there
and if not a God to, we plead,
the only want which shall live
is that to live alone
and not the wish of some
glittering crown
nor the heart of rustic brown.
And to live we shall think
for survival is the base
and life the face,
and that face shall be clean
and serene just like
it should be-not with a hung
heart and a formless love,
but one which goes higher than the clouds.

Misery is not what your friend has
and you don’t,but what you have
and that your friend doesn’t.
Yet for the one who truly owes
there is no misery
as he is enough profound
to know what is the right sound
and in what he is bound.
Happiness is a spark
of madness ,where in the touch,
if sustained leads to joy-
wet paint
that can either portray a beggar,a saint
or a maid or a triad or natures marvelous
mysteries and life’s magnanimity.

And in joy lies my eye
past misery and history
beyond the forest of trees
and gardens of vegetables and weeds,
where all that i see,
is a sensation which transforms
into me and my hands speak for me.
For never can the eye or hand lie,
the one who is controlled self
is all but his given his soul for theft.
Freedom is not buying wings
nor is it living in poverty
but seeking the pinnacle
which within you,you see.
And for humans and life, life
will flow on and things
might never end from here on
and since my life is all
but worth a vociferous bubble’s
being,it is delight to be alive
albeit the grey illusions
that make neither day nor night.
There is only one fight
that is surely not for might is right.
Forever from the edge of a ocean
within me i travel with devotion-
to me and my proposition.

And people may come
and people may go
but in my eyes
i live on forever.

the light shines the brightest

The ocean of thought.

We are all like fish.The only difference being that,we live on land and not in water.All the waters of the world,converge into one thing called sea.We all live between water,which occupies most of our world.Isn’t it beautiful that,the water has given us space to live? Among humanity too,there are a few people,who make and help create lives for the whole of humanity everywhere.These people are not huge in numbers,but in importance they are the oceans of the world.The men and women,who changed the world,are the reason why we all are still here.At every point in history,a few take it upon themselves,to save the race.There are so many forces within humanity,which exploits and makes humans,discard,their true purpose.At different points it has always been different forces.Today our world is very fast moving.Money is what talks,yet is it wrong making money?I don’t think so.I think what we should see is the way a person makes the money.To do ,to achieve things in life,we need a force and for man,that force is thought.Everything we do arises from somewhere within us.We need to think to survive and live.For us,what is really important,is not just eating and dieing,but beating our ancestors in every possible way.For us,GROWTH is the word.

Growth is the true purpose of everything.The universe keeps growing,species keep growing and life keeps evolving.Yet there always is a resistance against this force.The resistance,is the friction required for us to move forward.true enough,but the friction is too great for a few people. If each one of us could use our ability,to the maximum,just like that,without having to face the resistance of “society” imagine,where we would be.What makes the society,is us.We all are born with the same ability,yet why do a few people refuse to use their ability to think?Why is it that people lead to their own starvation and destruction? While i just wrote in the last post,that destruction is a phase on the way to peace,I didn’t mean the kind of destruction that these creatures ,these parasites of society impose on humanity .The destruction i was talking about there was the destruction of the walls,the destruction of ones illusions,the fight one has to go through within ,so that they understand the world better.Yet the only destruction that has taken place around us,is the destruction of thought.Once the ability to think is done with,then nothing else exists.We all are very proud of humanity,for having produced great intellectuals.Just think, what we have given for that.The tsystem a person like Einstein had to beat.The fight Galliello had to fight, etc.We all talk of some ancient battles which form the corner stone of our belief,yet do we realize why it had to be so? Do we understand what really the story means?When we talk of the Mahabaratha and the Bhagavath Gita,do we understand what was happening.I don’t think those our just story books, they represent the truth,for they were written when humanity was smaller and knowledge greater.Leaving everything else aside,what they say is this:- Do what you are supposed to do.Now to do what we are supposed to do,we need to use our head.All of us have the head,alright,so why not use it?

Terrorism.The most brutal form of not thinking.While a few of the better minds use their power,the others involved in it are just dumb creatures,whose brains have been washed,cleaned,dried and then filled with the idea of plundering.We all know where the diamonds come,don’t we? then why are we still fueling terrorists?Whose mistake is it that those human beings were to take up to such action?What law do they feel is breached,that they create more fear among the “commons” ? Incidents like 9/11 have always happened in the past,then why didn’t we learn from them?While it is necesaary to live in the present,if you think of the past,then you need to see it clearly.We all have heard of kingdoms being plundered and looted,we all have heard of people being killed in numbers,yet we never learnt.The only reason why those few intellectuals leave the “right” and take up the “wrong” is that they didn’t have a place here.There are stories which depict this,yet did we learn? Just take a second to think of those bed time stories.try analysing them.You will find that,you have,in your life,been all those characters.You have been the  snow white,you have been the hare and you have been the tortise.Yet no one has told you think of those stories as such.By the word of mouth a lot of things have survived.And by calling a few things as “tradition” many more things have survivied.Take a closer look and the truth stares at you.

So to understand things better,we need to think.Shakespeare says it as ” let discretion be your tutor”.When will we learn to use it? When will the society on the whole,choose the right people to lead them?When will the society,understand those few beings who have been the sea,in which they live?Is it that the society is scared of deeper waters ,that it calls the sea evil?Unless,every individual,realizes his/her true capability,till then we will never always have the two sections of humanity.There is no inbetween here,you either belong here or there.The third over here,is you.Unless we all decide to think and see beyond the contradictions,then their is no use,trying to emacipate.The only way to see the light,at the end of the tunnel,is the start moving.It doesn’t matter if you walk or run,you can take your own time,but stop trying to live in the darkness,you can’t live where you can’t see.

A lot has been done to try and light the lamp.Yet if you stamp or blow the light away,thinking that it is either waste of fuel or some enemy,you will never get to the end.The lamp is lit,so that you can use it to guide you.As you move along the path,add more fuel and let your fire grow.You will be able to see more and more around you.Realization dawns only ignorance sets,so throw shed your fear of the light,there is a better world and there are better things,then disgust and contempt and animosity.

Next time you do something,try to think why you do it.Next time ou speak,try to hear your own voice and try to understand what you are saying.Next time you are struck by beauty,see yourself as a part of the beauty.Next time face a problem,think of what might have presceeded it.Next time when everything seems dark,remember the day when we found fire.Next time you are left without hope,think of you as a child and see your future.And before all those next times,now think of your self and what you could be and what is your potential.

the light shines the brightest

P.S: Among other things,one of the major inspiration behind this is,the book “Atlas Shrugged” by Ayn Rand.

The enchantress of florence-Salman Rushdie

Enchantress of Florence is a book about Qara Koz,the youngest sister of Babar,the grand father of Akbar the great,in whose time the book is set.The book is about men,women,courtesans,wars,beliefs,queens,princes,princesses ,art,architecture,magic,tales etc of the then Europe and Asia.without going too deep into the book(and thus making this review a spoiler) ,i will try to talk about the book as a whole.

“In the beginning there were three friends,Niccolo ‘il Machia’,Agostino Vespucci and Antonino Argalia.’ And Argalia the turk,takes the descendant of Timur the lame as a left over of war.She and her servant mirror(who is a reflection of her) are brought to Florence after he leaves the land of the Turks behind.Here the Enchantress as she comes to be known,changes the lives of the people of Florence with her magic,until one day the duke is killed.The witch hunter are brought in,but she escapes.Fast forward into the ‘present’ and “a tall yellow-haired young European traveller calling himself ‘Mogor dell’Amore’,the Mughal of love,arrives at the court of the Great Mughal,the emperor Akbar”(from the book).he claims himself to be a relative of Akbar and he tells the Shahnshah about his mother.the tale carries itself ,with the jewels,the role of women in guarding tales and the lust of men.

The book has a lot of history to it and links the various events across Europe and Asia.In the last part it also touches upon the “mundus novus”(America).The book is quite rich in description of the various thing in that era.It also ‘touches’ upon ‘fucking'(sorry i tried not to use the word,but then when the author uses it so many times,it has to come in the review somewhere) .If you have the patience to read a book,which frankly could be written in fewer words,then this is a nice read.it didn’t get boring though and in a few places I was rolling in laughter because of the absurdity in the way which a few things were described( and the author leads you to believe in them too).this is the first time i picked up a Rushdie and i was surprised by it.All in all,if you have the time give it a read.

Modernization

Cars,buses,factories,sundry-pollution.
Gone are the days of contemplation
and thinking out the right equation.
Rushing,reckless and rusting; no retrospection
to think out what caused self-annihilation.
Modernization,the right of every modern nation,
also the lock of self suppression.

Is it our fault,that we hate ourselves?
Is it our fault that we no longer feel that brethren
is the best way for a civilization to show togetherness?
Why is it our (the so called modern children) fault,
that a lot of us end in depression?
Why as a race we have progressed,
but when we see the world,we get depressed.

depressed at the sight of life’s
value being quantified.
Depressed because we have no time
to sit and think,for as quick as wink,
the world wants us to swim or sink.
Why what do we have for ‘I’?
and do i have for ‘we’?

Fights,quarrels,aggression and humiliation.
Why on one side we are preached,
and the other side we are ordered,
now neither path seems greener,
for the truly green path is the
less beaten one.Why time has been
made faster and we all last longer.

No time to love and give respect.
No time to take love and respect.
No time to understand.
No time to explain,just don’t be a pain,
get things done-haste is not vain.
Try anything else,
you are branded from hell-insane.

Why modern religion all preach war,
all of them put love and humans far
apart.Why a few sing in praise
of a good God,but a few more,
sing praise of self-proclaimed
creatures-exploitation,the essence
of modernization.

Why being modern means so much more,
have your fire and cook,
have your oven and bake,
why get out and have more sake,
but cut out the fake,
unneeded airy waves,
too much of it will kill the race.

change your clothes.
It doesn’t mean cover up more.
All i ask is do as you really wish.
be yourself and understand the
pasts wish and the futures
desire to be rich-not in terms of money,
but in happiness and unity.

Sing your song-
not someone else’s lament.
Why you too are a human.
It is your tale which is important
and it is for your betterment.
Unless you are right,
the world will never be.

Build a factory,
let it not destroy one for another.
Build it with stones which suit you
and remember that you can
have only what is yours.
Your factor
should rewrite history.

Make your own way.
Dare,dare and dare,
cleave your path
and fill your wants,
but remember to remember
those who were and those
who are.For to dare is to see.

Let modernization be,
a new rebirth,
a renaissance,
one which will have the best-
of the past,present and the future.
Dynamic is our need,
and the food needs to be made ready.