The Customer is an asshole

November 19, 2012 § 2 Comments

The customer is an asshole because he demands you to deliver what you promised. Surely, the customer should know that all promises are empty? Well of course, the promise on the currency note , “I promise to pay…” is not empty, because the customer owes us. As a company which employs thousands of people, it is natural that there are salaries which might be paid and bonus which might be given if the employees are obedient enough to work all those unsaid, unwritten hours.

The customer is an asshole, because he takes away all those goods that took hours to produce, a fine product of human evolution- the amount of effort, time and capital put into it and still he finds something wrong, and shouldn’t he just shut up and admire evolution of humanity and admit that mistakes do happen, especially when so many people are involved? Doesn’t he have kids who shout aloud in trains?(not in planes because when employees wear short skirts they can kick out anyone they want)

How can he ask the market leader to waste precious capital(human and otherwise) on solving the problems of the tiny insignificant tittle twerp that he is? What will happen to the bigger picture, shouldn’t he just pay the bills whatever happens and understand that sometimes companies have to cheat and take that extra ten, hundred, thousand, ten thousand? What about those big shareholders who get tax-free dividends and owners who have multi-storey houses, how will they pay for that extra private jet?

The customer is an asshole, because he demands too much. How can you expect to have websites which actually work? How can they expect a business to not store personal information and bombard them with a million spam? How can a customer ask for a refund if a card is swiped twice? How can he demand that he tip for the service and not be forced to tip them anyway, even if the waiters are rude?

How can the customer ask for what he paid for to be provided when we don’t have it? Doesn’t he know all ads are misleading? Just see the newspapers, they know it and add a tiny disclaimer in some insignificant corner. The customer is an asshole because he can’t read the fine print and understand all those unsaid things- much like the labourers, what do these people know about economies anyway? What about share prices? What about bank loans? And all those other things which actually matter?

The customer is an asshole. Because that is what is the truth. Caveat Emptor. This is a fucking capitalist world and no that Ayn’t some Rand-om concept.


The isms of school life

November 21, 2008 § 11 Comments

Pessimism:- You never  know everything that is there to be known before an exam.

Optimism:-You can always look forward to coming back home after exams and sleeping.

Terrorism:-Exams morns,they bombarded you with thing which you never expected/didn’t know existed.

Materialism:-You invariably want everyone’s lunch(or)you wonder if you could get that useless phone your friend is talking about.

Euphemism:-You tell the teacher you were studying and forgot the book at home,when in fact  you felt that the book was heavy and a waste.

Fascism:- Politeness is not another brick in the wall nor being a part of an “English medium” school means that everything is English-its all appearance.

Racism:- *The following statement has been deleted by the author,to avoid trouble* Well lets be emphatic and put it simply as ,”we Indian’s are all racists-it just runs deeper than race” variably or invariably,your bound to feel that something is not just right there-the teachers themselves speak about “tamil’s(south Indians) and North Indians’ attitude.yet this is so innate in our system,that we really don’t realize that we are racists.(well if there is such a word-castists)

Humanism:-Being “good” is something which never does any good.Unless you can swear in at least three language and come up disgusting things on the spot,you are not human.Being part of humanity is a privilege and school teaches you that.

Pragmatism:-The best way to finish your assignments/home works in the shortest time possible,is to be creative-with your answers and reasons(if you cannot meet the deadline).

Socialism:-Everyone gets similar marks/everyone doesn’t submit their work/everyone accepts the blame.

Conservatism:-Year after the year,the students conserve one thing-becoming worse.If a batch fails to get the “you are the worse people we have ever seen”,then they have broken the tradition.

Sentimentalism:-Emotions are always on a high.What else happens when every guy feels a need to go out with a girl but then realizes that it is not worth it-either it is too emotional,empty pockets.

realism:-The world is a cruel place,the teachers themselves have seen only a part of it and keep telling you how you will be ruined if you go out,they are scared it seems,if not why are they teaching anyway?We can do away with a few of those teachers.

naturalism:-No not walking naked.Lieing comes naturally to every student.We are racists,here also-we have white lies which are supposedly small and harmless,when in fact we were ruled by them for over 200 years.

fundamentalism:-The religion is being a good student and the scriptures being arbitrary laws  passed on from gen to gen and of course amendments made every year,unsaid but felt.The latest law I observed-don’t be kind to your Seniors,swear on their face.

Alotropism:-Walking in a straigth line,is for the KG kids,not for 12th standards.

Absenteeism:-School is boring and waste of time,when everyone is present.It is more fun when there are 7-8 absentees per day.The teachers waste their time and energy trying to convince those who are present,that bunking school is not good.

Plagerism:-One person does the work,others copy.Life lesson learned early.Also the early bird catches the worm 🙂 Or the first guy to school gets the book 🙂 But then i have my own way,scribble to excape 🙂 

Falsism:-When people say things,just to satisfy someone,like a teacher.This in itself is an art,’cause most people would find it tough contradicting themselves.

Heroism:-Something which doesn’t apply to me, no i cannot lie.My Achilles heels seem to surface at the wrong time,well i wasn’t the hero,but at least i wasn’t zero.

Cynicism:-You hate it when people disturb you while you are looking at someone 😉 or catching up on your sleep.You support the fact that wanting it all,is the way to be.Yet the cynic is an abridge of the hero,at least in scolastic terms- in the eyes of his fellow socialists,he is viewed with much contempt.

Individualism:-Something which i follow.This basically includes not copying and standing on your own ,at whatever cost-makes sure you never get complacent.

Nihilism:-School,is just an eye wash.We don’t need no education.

Escapism:-Albeit this not being a cardinal virtue in any religion,it is in reality one.No one can ever sit in a class and not wonder to the fairy lands,rather chic lands.Procrastination is a vice,we don’t put off things,our clocks run on different time zones.

I am searching for more isms which have an affinity to the Indian school life.I have no clue what the difference is between here and in some monkey/donkey land,for the simple reason,I have been in this zoo,for the past 13 something years.Whatever maybe,i ardently support the cause of revamping our education system,for the simple reason,it is truly the survival of the strongest.Now don’t get me wrong,i do believe only the strong should live,but then this is might is right-more of parasites and hypocrites survive.

As the curtains call on my school life,the next stage of hunting and donating begins.This is one country where socialism of another kind exists,where in the rich pay donations,while the poor get in through reservations.If you don’t understand the underlying philosophy,i suggest you tune your cognition to Indian standards.While our English text books propagate Stephen Splender and ending the many veils thrown upon our beautiful society,the society reinforces its bleak views by holding on tightly,lest the prices drop.

This was supposed to be a humorous post and the humour lies in the fact,that i am wasting my time writing this,when in fact,the only satisfaction i can ever get would be the comments.I might sound like a pessimist,but than being a hero,demands too much and i am not  willing to go through the pain,not all alone.The society can burn in its own fire,I am going to be all but a responsible citizen of the future-I will step aside and let the fittest of the worse prevail and then see what i can do about it.The innate goodness is all good,unless you exhibit it for the sake of others,so i will keep it for myself and those who i care about.This is the maturity school has bought on me.Of course i should also credit this enigmatic blogging world for adding a few layers of matured dust on me-this after all is another one of those places,where we the public talk and talk and never do anything about what the majority seem to be thinking.This post is running of track,true,but then nostalgia is such,that it doesn’t allow precision.If i had written this in my English paper,i might have got better marks.

All the above mentioned isms are just the tip of the ice berg(through i have never seen a ice berg).If i were to dig,i can come up with more historically and archaeologically valuable visceral facts,that would send those bespectacled men into a binge.But for that accurate reason,I shall keep it all to myself,until another time,when little Tommy doesn’t want to play.This post essentially is to make me feel good and the psychological and chemical reactions with me,point that i have achieved that.

While the nexus might be inaudible,the bottom line is this-My school life is drawing to a close,in all of four months time.I shall soon be out into the big bad world,all dressed up and with memories of the days,in a wonderful school.My school is a place where i have learned a lot,positives too.That shall be aonther six yard tamilian intensified rant,so until than,i don’t think you will find me rant.

Thank you.

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