A Rant.

March 14, 2010 § 6 Comments

Yes,yes I am CA student. A new transformation has possessed me. Nerds watch out, I have decided to take this up. Oh! wait I have not. Go on, go on. You know I won’t get anywhere close to you. Simple because, I have a brain, which has drunk philosophy and embraced the Utopian dreams.

See that is how you can suck away the optimism. Now I am scrutinizing my English as I write, so do spare me, for a lack of zest. I haven’t been reading or listening to good English, thanks to the my exam preparations. I must admit though, that reading all that makes me feel wiser.

Actually I am really really wise. But no one is going to give a damn about wisdom. If you have wisdom, go and give advise to young things, they need to sleep. See what can you do then? When kings don’t listen to prophets and philosophers, empires shall be doomed from the North. If you do listen, you will find a beautiful maiden from the East.

But be warned, since ye doth not hears the saws of the wise one, doom awaits you. My head is not working properly. I lack the veer and swerve to write anything. I seem to be short of words. If not for Bones(ya the T.V. show) I might be a scarecrow by now.

I seem to appreciate humour which I usually never liked. The “peter” has turned into Jack, but there are no sparrows, only crows. Truthfully, I don’t really like all these laws and stuff. Yet.

No, I don’t mean I am going to start loving the subjects from tomorrow. I want to be a writer. But all that is happening is that whatever little the Muses gave me,  seem to be  getting screwed by legal requirements, taxes and laws. And the only bird I have seen for a while is Twitter.

So I think, I want to become an actor now. Come on I can act, alright! But ya ya, life is a disappointment in so many ways. Oh! the throes and tribulations! What does time decree anyway?

I am being too frank, maybe? I do wish, I can do something more. I feel stuck. I am not the sort of fellow, who is used to studying. Expectations, but they do exist. I wish, I existed a century or so before. I could have written words which would have stirred revolutions and stuff. Cool, I mean, kids would be reading about me and memorizing my poems and cursing me.

Or I might have been a saint or something. Wisdom and Bhakti sallying on command. The Gods’ dances and confusion would have been interpreted properly and maybe, I would have stopped Communalism and the other dirty works by putting some sense into few certain heads.

See I think too much. Maybe it is my imagination that spoils things for me. Maybe, I should be a narrow-minded ass. But, my education consisted of reading books, blogs and learning to see the world, think and appreciate stuff. Too much, I guess, for petty reality.

Or I should try becoming a rowdy. No need to worry about the law, about money etc etc. Waaaaat Machi? No, that sound like me. What can I do anyway? I am walking on a knife edge, or so it seems. I feel out of place. See I have grown a lot in the last year or so. Specially with respect to moving with people and all.

I have accepted that I am either going to be loved or hated and some how everyone notices me, where I go. Then I meet a few people and again I start hoping, but maybe I should wear broken glasses and see the vilified nature of men. But I am an idiot, I can’t. Can someone teach me?

I should stop now, or my emotions will take over. This blog, after all is open to everyone. See when you hide something, everyone wants to know. Have no secrets and no one will look, just let everyone know everything and they will be confused as to what you are anyway. They don’t get it that you are you.

See it is better to talk about abstracts glossed in metaphors. No one understands all that. It becomes like a code, which very few understand. I think, I will stop here. Thank you for reading. Pour some wisdom into me, but none which preaches common sense 😛

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