At a crossroad
May 12, 2010 § 9 Comments
So I haven’t posted anything for about two weeks. And I cannot let my blog, suffer can I? Actually I can. But then I have to write. While prodding over things as been a recent trend, today I aim to stay away from it. I am glad to announce that the optimism bug has bit me again!
So, you have formed an image of me, smiling noir and radiating effervesces of the Axe kind( but I doubt radiation will bring joy in this heat, turn on your AirCon, ha! that is better, see?) , I am sure. And I see myself as such. So much positivity in the air, no wonder we can’t see the antiparticles! I think, I am growing immune to the grief of the world no maybe not.
I refrain from straying into the world of mad gunmen, after all we made love to one such through our ever projecting and exposing media!
“Who will bear the whips and scorns of time? ” Dear Bard, I say time itself! Who would want to scar the raw flesh and taint the blood, so fresh?
Anyway, let me not run into some limericks or half boiled insane verses(after all I am a vegetarian). I saw my sister reading a book called Percy Jackson or something, apparently he is a half God and someone stole the thunder etc. So after taming werewolves and vampires, we make Gods seem petty. But then anything to do with God sells, except God.
There is so much demand. Well again, I am supposed to say something positive. The problem with positive things is that the lose the charge pretty fast(if you happen to be a student of physics, spare me, tax has already taxed me enough). A joke is a joke only for that long, but sad stories will always make people cry.
There are a lot of things to look forward to in life, but then you can only see so much. That’s the thrill, they say, but well, if you fall off a cliff it is better to die than live with broken bones surely( Murphy keep away!). Ha! so you are shocked!? Or you think, I am crazy. Or you might agree with me. Whatever.
Or maybe optimism is not merely about talking about good stuff in the present tense but rather has to do with the fickle future, always nebulous and it exists for sure?
Maybe this is not the time, for me to indulge and explore such thoughts. I am tired and taxed(quite literally) and well I hope it hasn’t been in vain.
If you ask me, I am growing too old. Innocence is a bliss and I want that back. I have grown up all of a sudden( how you ask? I shall tell you later. And now that cannot be your comment, pity 😛 ) and the world seems too weird a place to be in.
Because there are sane things and the insane things. On one side the days move as sure as a clock hand and on the other, the battery dies and takes people along with it the time freezes and NEWS channels advertise.
Maybe I sound callous. Maybe I am making sense. But I know, I am at a cross-road. The choice I make is informed to the extent I can be informed. What the path holds, only the world knows. I try to listen to it, I try to see as far as I can. I try to taste the wind, and smell the thoughts, only one thing is for sure, every land ends at a sea. What is behind that horizon? I waited for it to rise, I think I will go and see now.
P.S:- Shaved off my Moustache. How do I look?
And another jobless sketch..(you are seeing it the wrong way, turn your head right, how does it look now? 😛 )
Hi. (a post after 20 days!)
April 16, 2010 § 9 Comments
Listen to this while you read 🙂
My last noteworthy post was 20 days ago. And I blame it on Twitter(not entirely). Not that tweets compensate for writing, but when you read a lot of interesting stuff, you end up thinking and end of the day, you don’t know what to write about.
Actually that is not true, it has got more to do with my exams. So another 20 days or so to go, before I write my CA-IPCC(inter) exam. And contrary to common perception, I am not all that tensed. I generally don’t get tensed over exams, because they are certain. You get tensed only when things are uncertain. Of course, you can’t be certain of the result, but well results come after a couple of months and if you have done horribly, you can be prepared for the worse 😛
It is not laziness either, just that whenever I decide to write, I wonder why I want to write about myself. Not that there isn’t enough happening out there, but to write about other things, you need put a lot of thought to the given topic and then type a concise(me, concise?) and engaging post.
I wanted to write about the Tharoor vs Modi case, but then I tweeted enough I guess and besides writing a brilliant piece saying whatever I want to say, isn’t going to change anything, no, it isn’t going to get me additional readers either(I hate it when I sound so pessimistic, actually, that I am not pessimistic, just that I don’t want to start blogging in full swing, again, till my exams are over).
Notice, how I have eaten over 250 words, without saying anything worthwhile? I can be witty, you know. But then again wit is a waste of time, when not many get what I say(lack of wave length I say!). Or maybe I am not witty, just vetti.
Anyway, I think it is time for the Great LOL challenge again(yes, a year has passed and your sense of humour has gotten better, I hope), any volunteers to help me?(includes chatting with me and exchanging mails, lot at that..I can be quite a nag, you are warned).
Since I want to see a lot of comments, on this post, I stop 😛 Leave you guys with a couple of pics,
Oh! and if I feel confident that I am studying properly, watch this space for a couple of book and movie reviews(seen a few movies actually, just too lazy to review them 🙂 )
P.S:- Sorry, for not replying to comments, I know that is bad ethics..but.. 🙂
🙂 🙂 🙂
Can’t think of a title.
March 22, 2010 § 10 Comments
Having made great progress today, it is time to write a post. See, I never thought I will write so many personal posts. After all long long ago, when I started blogging, I wanted to change the world with what I write. Lest the fact that one fine day, I woke up, saw 0 hits, got irritated and moved to wordpress, be not forgotten.
I have grown, evolved, learned and dreamt through blogging. It has, in many ways, changed too. See I am smiling at my old, young and changed self. 14,15,16 indeed are a very fine period in ones life. From all those trials, tribulations, exams, lack of friends etc, I have come to a stage where I can sport a beard and curl my Moush.
See being stuck with books, creates a lot nostalgia. And when you see the sunset, a tinge of crystals beckon and wet the sweated cheeks and you reflect rather soberly about those bright young days, filled with anger, frustration, passion and belief. Truthfully I might have never taken to writing this much, if not for blogging. Those few comments, convinced me that I was destined to greatness.
I also learnt about the world, through the eyes of many bespectacled and some clear lens-ed souls. I saw that there were a few myopic people who existed. Reality though always surprises you. Mainly because this world of mine, requires a certain level of intellect. And if ever a bum decided to bug me, there is a way to block. So though I wasn’t completely prepared, I was prepared.
I haven’t blocked anyone as such. Guess I come across as too much of a serious fellow for people to take me on(or maybe people smiled and declared that I will learn as time passes and went on). But I have come to learn and understand that there are reasons for problems and that it is necessary to get to the bottom of the problem and not fight the hydra.
Issues are complex beings. Life is a complex thing. You see, every action of mine, has a history behind it. Impulse in itself is a product of deliberation, suppression, need, want and expression. If you swat a poor mosquito, you do more than stop a poor creature fr0m sucking your blood, the force you use, is built with speed, anger and what not, developed and stored over a period of time, to express a need.
Now I am not digressing. Rather try and connect the different points. I am in simple terms reflecting upon the times when my frontal lobe was still in its innocence and slowly realising the foibles and ridicules and stupidity in this world. At 18, today, I somehow feel bigger.
At 6 feet something, I do think I can tower over things. There aren’t many that can shadow me, but when I do end up in a shadow, it causes a lot of retrospection. And maybe, I am under one such shadow now. Maybe this (pseudo) education system is the biggest scourge in this country.
I know, I have offered nothing interesting in this post(till now) , unless you happen to be someone close to me or a shrink(I have respect for shrinks, in fact I have always wanted to be one). This has no humour nor the vigour which is what usually draws people.
But people are weird, people. If you don’t believe me, see the mirror and register that person in your head. Now when you speak or do anything, try making that person in the mirror do the same within your head, you will be surprised, trust me. This does require some exploitation of your spatial repertoire, but everyone possess at least a jig, so don’t give me excuses.
And if you are too great for such petty things(why did you read till this anyway?), you probably should stand up and drive.
Hell to humour, what’s funny anyway? Humour is Overdrawn and no one is going to repay it. Now when you have such a liability, you are bound have some assets and it surely isn’t cash, so go figure. If you have no clue what that was about, be happy, you aren’t missing anything worth not missing, trust me.
Intelligence is no guarantee for success and the juvenile delinquent asks why should you waste your time studying.
I am jea. I agree. But unfortunately, fairy tales have princesses and heroes. Now how am I to afford a palace, be a gentleman and not a disgruntled driver? Well if you want, you can be a chauffeur for a Ferrari, but you still don’t owe it.
And the philosopher in me says, ” you own nothing, everything is an illusion”.
I need to go figure. Wait I have figured it out. But you need to learn for yourself. So, sit and reflect. Maybe it is better to agnostic. At least you have a riddle to solve. But costing and laws await me. I have to get back to reading stuff, which give me no joy. But I am not about to complain, exams are getting closer. So follow me on twitter 😛
P.S:- Have lots of posts to read, but am busy studying 😛 Same reason for not replying to comments 🙂 I love comments, so don’t stop 😀
THE EXTRA TERRESTRIALS SHOW
February 4, 2010 § 11 Comments
They guaranteed “wow!” and they did it. Guess words can’t describe the acts.
The one wheel wonder! Some breath-taking moves. Speed and magnificence of a new degree!
Well standing on a small platform, these two made you wonder, why you try to keep going in circles, even after you stop spinning. Human top on skates!
Probably the most subtle of all the performances. This statue(er…guy) holds his head in his hands! Fluid and prolific and yes he leaves you jaws down, wondering how someone can move like that!
Does gravity exist? probably not, for these two. The golden duo, opened the show and my didn’t they mesmerise everyone!
The best exponent of the German wheel. Quick and brilliant moves. Amazin’ !!
Lord Of the Rings. Guess I don’t need to say anything else! Never seen anyone like him!
Laser man:- This fellow can bend light. No joking, really!
There was another performance by an awesome threesome. A superb act of fine balance. Well as I said words can’t describe the show, it was just tooooooooooooooooooooooo awesome!!!
Catch it if you can. A must watch. For more see here.
1)all photos are from their official website(link given above).
2) I got a free ticket for the event. More about it here.
A shot at the world record for the most number of participants in a live painting competition
January 29, 2010 § 18 Comments
The Rotary Club of Madras Central organized a drawing competition, “Chithiram Pesuthadi”. The competition aimed to break the existing world record for the most number of participants in a live painting competition(Guinness record) . About 16000-20000 students participated and I guess that should do it(the official numbers should be submitted to Guinness before conformation).
Probably the only place in the city, which can hold so many people at the same time, is the Chepauk Stadium. The event co-sponsored by Abirami Mega mall was inaugurated by The Mayor of Chennai, M.Subramaniam and the governor of Rotary District 3230. The competition kicked off at about 11:30 and got over at about 1:00 pm.
It was well organized and thought out. Wooden stands and cardboards were placed in front of the seats, to make it easier for the children to paint. Paints, brushes, pencils , erasers, papers etc were provided by the organizers along with snacks and water.
It was a breath-taking site, to see so many young artists paint at the same time. The event saw both private schools as well as corporation schools taking part(the latter being more disciplined). It was a humongous event, especially considering the logistics involved.
Special buses were organised, organizers recruited and of course preparing the painting stands and making sure every child gets a proper chance at painting. And the children did justice to the opportunity provided. The differently abled children should get a special mention, especially this boy:-
And this kid too:-
Funny, none of the television channels seemed to have covered it(correct me if I am wrong). After all it is not every day such an event is going to take place. As mentioned the corporation school kids were way better- kids from private schools started flinging the cardboards provided on to the ground and the teachers and volunteers couldn’t do anything about it. Fortunately, nothing went out of control.
In all the event was a big success. The police and the corporation of Chennai should get a special mention. The results will be announced soon.
Something about me
January 24, 2010 § 20 Comments
This probably has become a habit now. Sunday afternoon posts. There is something comforting about it(though it doesn’t fetch many comments). Today I am going to write something about me.
ASPIRE, is the word. Now what do I aspire to be? The way I talk , people think I have it all figured out. So here is the truth- I haven’t figured out anything.
True, I am doing CA(about 100 days to go for the exam *sigh), but well I am not really into the idea of working as one. I am doing it because otherwise I will be wasting my time with B.Com alone. Of course, not that formal education is going to turn me into Bill Gates.
SO what do I want to be? Well, when I was a kid, I wanted to be an astronaut, but that seems pretty far away, especially since I am in the commerce stream(you can make my day, by telling me, how I can still become one). Some how the idea of flying in an almost surreal world, combined with views of swargaloka(though I had figured out,even back then, that it didn’t exist) , comets and planets, captivated my imagination.
I used to be left to my own devices. In a world of “big kids” and adults, I usually found day dreaming and imagining more fun. Superman and Spiderman, were never my favorites, simple because they had too much to do with humans. I preferred my own characters and turned even the most mundane object into something awesome.
I used to rearrange chairs and make the nether world beneath tables and beds my cool crafts. In short I wanted to be a superhero, but with another dimension- I wanted to be up above the world so high, like a diamond in the sky.
Some how I have always felt more comfortable, in my own world. People who know the gregarious me , will be surprised. After all, I keep making friends(and ‘enemies’ so to speak) all the time. But behind that there is that love for being in my own world. And probably that is why, I have never feared any God, as such- I saw the idols as “fun people to play with” and used to think of new wars and stories.
And I used to be shy(The change probably came during the summer of 2007 and of course blogging, but more about it later)- I couldn’t stand being blindfolded(those games at kiddy parties) or being too far away from people I knew. There is a gap of six years between me and my sister, so that probably, added my preference for playing alone.
Building blocks were a strong favourite. I probably would have made will make a very good architect. The scope they offer along with their definite proportions is overwhelming. Only wish I had bigger blocks to build now.
We have a swing at home. And I have never fell down from a swing. For others it might be horses and ponies, for me it is swings.I came up with a variety of polo- cycle polo(among myriad others) The opposition- chairs, tables and anything/anyone in my way.
Imagination changes everything. It gives you a lot of freedom, blank walls become carpets of history and thoughts, the sky holds animals and people.
I was and still am a very cautious person. I never take on anything head first. I see, I analyse and then act. People around me can make fun of me, but I analysed how to walk on walls way before any of my class mates did, I am sure. Walls offer a great way to practise balance.
Walking around the perimeter of my house and imaging all sort of opponents and ways to fight them. I think I have fallen from a wall, only once, that too, when I tried to get down hurriedly, for some unknown reason but then again, that probably is it. I hate making big mistakes and make sure they never happen again(?).
My judgement is mostly right, because as I said, I never get into something without thinking about it. The only place where my prognosis might be wrong, is here, the blogging world. It still hurts to think that my idea failed to materialise.
I am a bad loser. I cannot stand losing. And yet success in competitions, exams and even sports, has eluded me. I set high standards (probably too high, thanks to being the hero in my small little world) and when the bubble broke, I used to feel very very low.
True to my sun sign, I can very emotional, sensitive, while in fact I seem the contrary. And that has given a sort of “emotional photographic memory”. Colours have always fascinated me(my mom will tell you, that she had to teach me “white”, because I refused to accept white to be white, I am very tenacious) and though I am not all that great at drawing, I like to doodle.
Cricket cards and cricket. I remember the vigour with which we used to collect those things. When I grew older, it was replaced with cards, but it was cricket at least till I was 9-10. The only part of cricket I still like is bowling. I like anything which can be made to act under my spell. Batting is no fun, I probably got no where in cricket, because I refused to play forward defence in my coaching class(much much later).
Watching. Trains, autos, sky, construction etc. Sitting quietly and observing things, is second nature to me. And questioning when I don’t understand is first. While now I can articulate and describe it, back then, I think I understood that a lot of effort goes into it and felt that everything could be figured out. The element here is, that things can be moulded and can fit in.
I am already approaching the 1000 words mark, but these are things which I love to recount. Someone questioned me a few years back(on one of my poems), how can someone so young write such stuff. To me and probably to people who have seen me grow up, it has never been a surprise. I enjoy thinking, watching, observing and most of all creating.
|From Drop Box|
I started to write much later. But writing is a sum of all those things which I used to love doing, which I cannot do now because of various reasons. It is my shell, where I can hide, it is where I am the hero again and where things cement and mould into each other, the way I want.
The paint will stain the walls in the angles I want and the sky is probably not that high. unlike other kids, I never wanted to be a doctor when I saw one, an engineer or a teacher, I wanted to be an astronaut and I believed it was possible and still do.
I learnt history, tales and fables and politics through my grand dad. That probably is the reason, why I never struggled in social science like others- I knew them already and to me, they were plays being performed in my head. India in my head, was a fantastic idea, it was a passion and something which we fought for and got it. It is our home and we belong here.
Yet time has disrupted that view. More than time, it is people. I still have the belief in my dreams. I still believe India can be much more, India can be the best. But it is the people. And that is the element, which though I understand a lot about, I fail to understand one thing- the need to be caught in a box. Or maybe I am.
But one thing is for sure. What I want to be, What I really want to be , What I really really want to be, is , a writer. And I am one. It doesn’t matter if no one reads what I write. I have always been the hero. The skies and the walls and the chairs and my friends are there for me. That is why I say, I write for myself.
It probably is a wall, erected to block the disappointment of not being what I imagined what I write will bring to me, but it has a door. You can knock, I am waiting.
P.S:- The post should tell you one more thing about me- I can be random and let my thinking cleave it’s own path.
rains, NEWS etc
November 9, 2009 § 20 Comments
Its been raining Chennai for the past few days. So no classes blah blah. Of course none of the national NEWS channels would have told you that many have died and many more misplaced and that schools and colleges have been closed etc(that doesn’t stop a few colleges and schools from working). Wrote a poem as well(in my poetry blog).
More about the second photo later.
I do wonder why rains in Chennai/TN don’t make it to the NEWS. Someone gets crushed by a bus in Delhi and the media is all over the place, someone sneezes in Mumbai and its hot NEWS. I am just curious that is all. After all people with better discretion run those things, the fourth estate etc etc.
We have had a couple of political fiascos going on as well. MNS, breaking microphones and well even trying to assault another leader in the Maharashtra assembly. Cool. We can forget about peace talks and Gandhigiri with such people around. No wonder others think they can lay claim to pieces of our land.
And of course one poor politician getting caught at it. I am a CA student and well the IT act(well a part of it, for my level) is there in the syllabus and trust me, it is the most complicated thing I have never read/tried to read. As I commented – why don’t we let the IT department go after terrorists? (as per the act, illegal income is also taxable(correct me wise ones). But we all do know, the reality, if not the truth. Come on , where is 1.5 crores and over 2000 crores?
Farmville- well am jobless enough to afford getting caught up in something for a while. So yes, apart from the NEWS channels, this has kept me going(and tweeting and blogging as well). I get detoxed pretty fast, so am not worried about getting addicted etc(though it did feature in my dream yesterday night, does that count?) .
Anyway its been 20 years since the Berlin wall fell. It showed that people can rise together and get what they want. We can learn a lot from history, but ironically the only people who learn it(you and me) don’t care about it(the least popular subject in schools I think).
Once upon a time, I used to dream of making a world a better place etc, but when everyone hung up on making things bad, you can’t really stop anyone. So anyway, the present gen. will long be gone, it won’t be gen. X or Y it will be another one, but surely a human one(hopefully nature doesn’t watch movies/listen to humans-2012?).
What most of don’t realize is that, it is not the planet which needs saving, it is our race. This rock has been here for aeons, what makes you think, a bunch of petty creatures can destroy it? Human vanity, nothing else. And remember we are part of nature as well. Intelligence does weird things to you, like making you think you have too heavy head. Just use it, stop trying to praise it too much. *and my comp is usually on for about 12 hours a day 😛 *
Lots more to say, but this post is just a random one, so let me end by remind you of the Great Super Heroes Challenge, just scroll down, you will find it.
HAPPY DIWALI :D :D :D
October 16, 2009 § 19 Comments
Happy happy Diwali everyone 😀 Have fun! 😀 😀
The light shines the brightest 😀