Shutting it tight
October 5, 2011 § 3 Comments
There is the point of indifference. I seem to keep reaching it only to feel the pinch again. There are times when tomorrow is already here. That feeling that it is inevitable that I have to go through my day. I crib a lot on twitter, but I am not sure if it is heart-felt any more. Probably a knee jerk reaction to everything that is happening, a vent.
I still haven’t got the hang of this friendship thing. At one moment a person is nice and smiling at you. The next moment they act like a stranger. It is confusing. And these aren’t random people you get to know on the web, these are ‘real people’. Going through random quotes on friendship isn’t going to help. There is no point really, it seems tiring to talk to people. I used to talk a lot. Now days, I have stopped talking to people all that much. A random conversation with a stranger on a train is fine but talking to ‘acquaintance’ isn’t worth it anymore.
I am afraid to talk about ‘me’. Talking about what I do is fine but I am not too sure if I can talk about myself to anyone. You think someone has become a friend and has risen beyond seeing you as weak when you talk about problems but it isn’t so. Even with people who you have known for most of your life. This probably is growing up- one needs to shut oneself in a tight shell.
It is remarkable how one has to learn not to be offended, as well. My standards for the world have almost reached 0 but not quite. Still, day by day my expectations keep falling(much like the stock markets now). Twitter helps me retain my sanity, still there are times I wonder what is the purpose of the whole site.
People may come, people may go but I go on forever.
I believe that human beings should be vulnerable and allow themselves to be hurt. Otherwise relationships cannot be built. By shutting oneself out of fear of getting hurt one shuts off true human contact. Yes, there are people who hurt you, but one day you will find someone who doesn’t. You need to be able to keep your heart open for that person. Whether a friend or an acquaintance. I have been hurt by more people than I can count, perhaps hundreds, and I mean hurt enough to make me cry. But that is why I appreciate those true relationships which I have built over the years and treasure more than anything in the world.
Fragile relationships thy name is life!
people come and go and some hurt a lot and some even leave you broken..almost unrepairable but if you have been true, then someone comes along who is worth all the wait and heals you like nothing ever happened. keep the faith.
It is bit worrisome that you say twitter keep you sane…giving so much importance to a website whose very basis is so ephemeral??